What Love is This?

This always seems to happen to me. I have a good God time that I wanna share. Every single time it's late at night. It's when I just wanna go to bed, but can't sleep until I get all my thoughts off my brain. That's when I write. I haven't blogged in quite some time. I've taken to journaling more recently, but wanted to blog tonight. If you don't want to read a lot of rambling just stop reading now. My brain tends to be a mess of a few different things, never the same one thing. So here it goes.

My life's been pretty crazy in the last few months. Tons of changes have been going on in my life. I've started college, I moved to the cities (I'll be honest, I've always said I would never in my life live in the cities, I'm a proud country girl), I've gone from working roughly 6 out of the 7 days down to just the weekends, I've been meeting lots of new and wonderful people, I've started going to a new church, I started dating a wonderful, Godly man, and realized some new dreams of my own. It's been a little stressful at times, but I wouldn't change it for anything. I've learned a lot in the last few months about God, people, and myself. This knowledge is something I don't ever want to forget or lose. It's something that I want to forever have in my mind.

Tonight I was driving home. I plugged in my iPod and put it on shuffle. I started to drown out the music and started to think about some things that have happened to me in the past few years. I've realized just how much I've gone through. Things that if I hadn't had God right there with me, I don't know how I would've made it. I don't wanna go into detail about all that. But then a new song started up and I started to really listen to this one. I instantly broke into tears as What Love is This by Kari Jobe was playing. The song basically talks about how great God's love is for us and coming to a realization that God is enough, always. No matter what we're facing or going through, God is big enough. There's nothing that God can't handle. He's bigger than our circumstances. He's also enough. All too many times, we as humans go looking to things of this world to fulfill this...space in our hearts that only God can fill. Nothing this world has to offer can be enough to fill that space. Only God can. Let's be honest, out of everything in this world the only thing you REALLY need is God. Where would you be without Him, honestly?

I guess with the busyness of life, I've kind of forgotten just how much love God has for me. And tonight I was reminded of how much God loves me. How I can't even begin to comprehend His love for me. Just another sinful human. Yet, He loves me. He gave His Son to die for me, for my sins. His Son loved me so much, He was WILLING to die for me and my sins. That's the greatest love there is.

Anyway, I think I've emptied my brain for tonight.

Conforming

Why do oh so many people conform to what society wants them to be? Or so they can fit in? Or say they can try to be friends with every single person they meet? Or so they can try to get the guy/girl?

What has happened to being an individual? What's happened to being who God created you to be? Why make life a competition? Why see who can be friends with more people? Why see who can have the coolest car/clothes/friends...ect.

This is something that's strongly been on my heart recently. God created us all as individuals for a specific purpose. Seriously, how boring would this world be if we were all alike? Think about it. You want to be like everyone else, yet EVERYONE is different!! Yes, there's a lot of things you can have in common with a person, but no two people are exactly alike. Why conform to something less than what God has created you to be?!

I honestly believe that when you conform to something you're not, you're bringing yourself down in a way.  Seriously, I don't care how many times you've heard this, but God loves you just the way you are. He always have. Always will. He created you the way you are for a purpose and a reason. He put those things you like or dislike in you for a reason. He didn't want for any two people to be exactly alike, or He would've done it. Because He easily could have.

Now, when you conform to something you're not, you're taking away from what God has created. You were created with  a PURPOSE! Don't conform and forget about your purpose, whether you know your purpose yet or not. Be the one and only YOU!

I have found that when you pretend to be something you're not, you're not happy. You have to put on this facade. And then you have to keep up with it to keep everyone else thinking you're this person that you're really not at all. What kind of life is that? Really? I personally have maybe 3 or 4 really close friends who I can trust and talk to about anything. I'd much rather have that than have hundreds of friends who I don't know if I can trust them or not, or being their friend means being something I'm not. True friends accept you for who you are. I'll tell you something, I'm the happiest I've probably ever been. And it's because I'm accepting who I am. I'm proud to be myself. I don't care about how many people I can become friends with. I don't care if so and so is gonna like my outfit. I don't care if this guy or that guy is gonna find me attractive. I just DON'T CARE. In the span of eternity, that's not gonna matter one bit.

So many people will conform so a certain guy/girl will like them. Listen to me, if you have to change for someone to like you, they're not worth it. You can't keep that act up forever. The true you will eventually come out. And then what?

Anyway, I don't know if any of this is getting anywhere with you, but it's what's in my head and I have to get it out someway, so I blog. :)

Life

Today, all I could think about is how way too many of us take life for granted. We take for granted the time we have with our family and friends. Sadly, it took a family member of mine getting cancer for me to really think about this. I spent time with my siblings today. Quality time with them. And I thought, what if I don't get to do this tomorrow? We never know when we're going to die. Only God knows the number of our days on this earth.

But then this also makes me think about how I'm living. Am I living for Him, or am I just wasting my life? Hard question to ask and be honest with yourself about, but important for you to answer. I've been reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan the past few weeks. It's an amazing book! It really makes you think about how you're living your life. As hard as it is to face the truth, you have to. Living life "good enough" isn't what God put us on this earth for. So why are so many of us ok with it? Why are we so obsessed with what we look like, what kind of car we drive, who we're friends with, or how much money we make? It's not going to matter in the span of eternity. Those things aren't going to get you into heaven. Only living completely for God and obeying his commands is what matters. Think about it, when you're only concerned with how you look, who you hang with, etc, are you sincerely happy? Do you have true joy? In my experience, I was never happy when I was living like that. Never. When I'm living to please God rather than man, I have true joy. When I can just talk with God, I have true joy. Because I know no matter what, God will always love me. He doesn't love my sin, but He loves me. That makes me want to confess my sins to Him, ask Him to help me.

We all just like to be comfortable. But God hasn't called us to be comfortable. All I have to say is, get comfortable with being uncomfortable. It's how you grow. When you do things for God that you're not comfortable with, you become more and more comfortable with them the more you do them! God doesn't want you to stay in the same place. He wants us all to move forward. To grow in our relationship with Him.

Anyway, sorry this kind of has a few different topics, but once I get going, there's no stopping until it's all out. :)

P.S. Prayer for my great grandpa, Arvid, are greatly appreciated!

Dating

Dating. We all come to the point in our lives when we decide to date. But we need to be asking ourselves one question, "Why do I want to date?"

So many people these days date only because they want someone of the opposite gender to do things with. Relationships can't last on the things you do with each other. Yes doing things together is very important but that's not what the relationship should be based around. Too many people want to do date for the sake of saying that they're dating. They want that status. They do it for the sake of saying, yea, I'm dating. Some want to date for the butterfly feelings they get in the pit of their stomachs, or the "fireworks". Relationships won't last on butterflies or fireworks.

You should date the person that God has created for you. Yes, it is sometimes hard to be patient. Especially when you're a girl like me who really wants to be a wife to a good man. To be the helpmate to him. But trust me when I say, it's going to be worth the wait. I know this because I know God's preparing a man for me, just as He is preparing me for that man.

Dating should be about a relationship with a person. A friendship. You're supposed to marry your best friend right? Relationships have ups and downs. No matter what, because we're all only human. Relationships should be about putting the other person before yourself. And that goes for all your relationships, not just dating. Sometimes you will have to compromise and you will have to make sacrifices.  God should be the center of all relationships. If you're dating someone and God is the center of your relationship, He'll bring you closer together. God MUST come first.

Anyway, that's what's been on my mind today.   :)

Mirror Mirror

I've been thinking a lot about how girls just aren't happy with themselves at some point in life. It honestly breaks my heart to see girls starve themselves because society says they're not skinny enough. It breaks my heart to see girls change themselves to try and get attention from a guy who doesn't really care about her and her heart. I was thinking about it all day today, so I sat down and wrote this out.

"You look in the mirror. You're not happy with what you see. So you decide to change it. You start to starve yourself to get skinnier. You put on makeup until you don't look like you anymore. You try to make yourself look like models and actresses who get all the attention from guys. Then, you start to get the same kind of attention. But strangely, you don't have joy. You're not the real you anymore. You're putting on a show. You spend all your time and energy on your appearance. What you should know is, you're going after the wrong kind of attention. 

There is One who has loved you from the very beginning. He doesn't care what you're wearing or if your hair and makeup are done just right. He loves you for who you are, for who He's created you to be. His name is God. He wants an intimate relationship with you. The more time you spend with Him, the more you realize just how much He loves you. You realize just how precious you are. Without all the makeup, clothes, and hair. You'll find you have true joy! He just loves YOU! Plain and simple."

Don't let a mirror define you. Don't let society define you. You are beautiful because of who God has created you to be. There could never be a more beautiful you! 

Life

Life. It's a beautiful thing, a wonderful thing that God has created. But it has it's end. And for some, it ends too soon. This week I've heard of two tragic deaths. One of them, I knew. The other was friends with my cousin and I didn't get the chance to meet her.

One of them died from cancer. He was only 21. The other was a friend of my cousin and she was shot. She was either 18 or 19. When I heard this, it got me thinking. Why do we just stand by when these things happen? I mean yes it is a part of life, but these are our brothers and sister in Christ! It made me mad to hear that the lives of these young people were taken, and in such a terrible way too.

As I was thinking, I kind of just analyzed everything, and this is what I came up with: Even though these young people aren't related to me by blood, they are my brother and sister in Christ. Therefore, they ARE family to me. I'm not just going to look at all of this and go "That's sad." I'm going to take action. I'm going to be praying for the families of these young people. Even though they probably won't know that I am praying for them, God can still move! They don't need to know that I'm praying in order for the prayer to be answered.

Life is short. We need to realize why we were put on this earth and live life with purpose.

Power of Words

Our words are so powerful. I've been told this since I was a little kid, and I've believed it. But tonight I saw a new light on it. 


I was in my car and I had some worship music on. The song We Are Hungry came on. The lyric is "We are hungry, we are hungry, we are hungry for more of You. We are thirsty, we are thirsty, we are thirsty for more of you." And sitting there in my car I was singing along and I started singing it "I am hungry, I am hungry..." and so on. And it had a whole different meaning to it. I've sang this song in church so many times, and it's amazing! Amazing that the body of Christ wants that!! But sitting there just me and God and I'm singing it that I want more of Him meant more. We shouldn't just be hungry for Him on Sunday mornings. It should be everyday! That's a concept that a lot of us don't get, especially here in America where we have everything at our fingertips. We tend to forget who gave us those things. 


Another thing is, we NEED to be careful about what's coming out of our mouths. Are our words building someone up, or tearing them down? I know we're all guilty of saying things we shouldn't. We're human. We need to learn to control our tongue. 
Proverbs 12:18 says, "There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." Would you rather have your words be like sword thrusts, or have them bring healing? Start speaking life into people! I know there's people out there don't you really don't like, there really isn't escaping them. There's always gonna be someone around you that you don't necessarily like. So instead of going to someone and talking about how much you can't stand them and every little thing about them that bothers you, look at their positives, speak life into their lives. Maybe God placed you in their lives for a reason. Maybe they're looking for a reason to live. 


Matthew 15:18 says, "But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person." What's in your heart will come out of your mouth. To make a change, you need to start by checking your heart. Learn to love people despite the wrong they do to you. Ask God to help you, He loves to be a part of your life! And He already sees what's going on. 


Psalm 121:1-2-I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.